


On a Wednesday, in a Cafe

by mosylu



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Homecoming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:22:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22792438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mosylu/pseuds/mosylu
Summary: When Cisco returns from his trip, he and Caitlin have a lot to talk about - including something that neither of them has ever said aloud.
Relationships: Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow, past Cisco Ramon/Kamilla Hwang
Kudos: 20





	On a Wednesday, in a Cafe

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Taylor Swift's "Begin Again" which I love for being such a hopeful song.

“Hi, welcome to Jitters,” the barista said when she walked up to the counter. “Decaf chai latte from the app, right?”

“Right. Thanks.” Caitlin forced a pleasant smile onto her tired face and reached out for her drink.

But instead of handing it over, the girl said, “Look who’s here!”

Caitlin blinked at her. It had been a long day and she really just wanted to sit quietly in a corner and unwind before going home and to bed.

But the barista waved a hand. “Look!” she said insistently.

Caitlin turned her head and saw a man sitting at her usual table. She started to be annoyed, but something throttled the emotion before it could fully form. She knew those shoulders. She knew the sheen of that dark hair, even if it was caught back in a ponytail at the nape of his neck. She knew that broad-palmed hand that lifted to tuck a stray lock behind his ear. She even knew that huge hockey bag down by his feet.

“That’s your friend, right? You guys always used to be in here together.”

“Right,” Caitlin said faintly. She took her drink and walked over to the table. “Cisco?”

His head whipped around, and she knew that smile too, even if it was buried in a thick, dark beard. “Caitlin! Hey!”

He leapt up and hugged her. She hugged him back, the solid feel of his body against hers feeding some hunger inside her.

He let her go first, and she made herself release him. “I literally just texted you,” he said. 

She pulled her phone out and saw his message glowing on the screen. _Just got into the CC,_ it said. _Can I crash with you for the night?_

She looked up. “Of course you can. You don’t even need to ask.”

He grinned. “Thought maybe I should check. Just in case you had a, uh, a guest already.”

She felt her cheeks heat. “No guests,” she said. “Not for awhile.” _Nobody but you,_ she almost said, and felt herself blush hotter. 

He looked at her for a moment, and then said, “Well. Good.”

She popped the lid off her drink and stirred it absently. “So,” she said. “How long are you in town this time?”

He’d been gone for months, on the road checking out what had changed after Crisis. He would upload his findings to the Star Labs database and stop into Central City for a day or two when his path took him there. The last time, he’d stayed with Caitlin.

“I think,” he said slowly, “that I’m back for good.”

She looked up. “For good? Really?”

“Yeah, I’ve hit all the major cities with a meta presence. Think I got a handle on what’s changed now. We’ll probably still get the occasional shock here and there, but the project’s done as far as I’m concerned. And - ” He met her eyes. “It’s time, you know? I took my break.”

She put her hand over his. “You know there’s a high chance you’ll run into Kamilla. She still works with Iris.”

“Yeah. I know.”

“How are you doing?” she asked.

The night it had happened, he’d texted her. _It’s over. We broke up. I can’t stay here. Can I crash on your couch?_

She’d texted back _of course_ immediately. 

He’d come over with a bottle of vodka and no information other than that long distance had been too hard on their relationship. He’d asked to watch Star Wars (“original trilogy, obvs”), and had only cried a little, when Princess Leia told Han Solo she loved him and he’d said he knew. 

He’d been gone by the time she’d woken up the next morning, her sofa bed folded up and the blankets and pillows stacked neatly on the cushions. 

They usually texted when he was on the road, and when he video-called, it was to the cortex because he’d learned something everyone needed to know. So it had been hard to gauge how he was handling the breakup, and when she asked, he just replied that he was handling it okay.

He did look okay. Not nearly as wrecked as he had been after Cynthia. Of course, it had been two months.

He met her eyes. “I’m doing all right,” he said. “I won’t lie, being out of Central City really helped.”

“Your stuff is all in storage,” she said. “Kamilla packed it all up for you.”

“I know. She sent me the address of the storage place. And the bill, which is fair.” He toyed with his phone. “I did a lot of thinking. A little drinking. And, uh, for future reference, ‘I’m in town for a week and I’m newly single’ is apparently, like, Tinder catnip.”

It hit her like a thump in the chest, and she pretended to take a sip of her latte to cover her baffling reaction. 

They’d talked about their sex lives before. Not in graphic detail or anything, but she’d always known when he was dating or had an FWB or having a dry spell, just like he had with her.

Of course he would have had a few hookups. She should have known he would. That was one of his breakup go-tos, along with drinking more than he should and watching the angstiest, most dramatic telenovelas so he would have an excuse to cry. 

“Hey,” he said, and she looked up. “I know what you’re thinking.”

She felt her cheeks heat. “What’s that?”

“Yes, I was safe, and yes, they were nice.”

That hadn’t been even close to what she’d been thinking, but she went with it. “Well, good. That’s all I ask.”

His smile faded. “How’s, uh, how’s she doing?”

“I haven’t seen her much,” she said tactfully. “It would be awkward, you know.”

“Right.”

“But Iris says she’s doing okay.”

Iris had also added that if she never heard that one Lizzo song again, it would be too soon, but Caitlin didn’t share that.

She bunched up her napkin and made herself drop it, smoothing it on the table. “Are you going to let her know you’re home?”

“I should,” he said, scratching at the edge of his beard. “Just as a heads up. Maybe we’ll get coffee or something, just for closure. But that’s her call.”

She was quiet a moment more, but he didn’t seem to be up for talking about it. She thought _closure_ and realized again that they really had broken up. Somehow it had been hard to believe it.

“So, how are things around here? You mentioned Frost and Sue were getting into it a little.”

“Oh, adjustment pains,” she assured him. “You know how Frost doesn’t like new people in the group, and Sue is kind of like a cat, in that if someone doesn’t like her, she makes it her mission in life to annoy them. It’s much better now. They’ve worked it out.”

“Yeah? Really? What happened?”

“I don’t have all the details, but judging by the hangover the next morning, tequila shots were involved.”

“Just tequila shots?”

“Sue pleaded the Fifth and so far there’s not a warrant out for Frost, so I thought it best to leave it there.”

He laughed. “So otherwise, how is the famous Sue?”

She started filling him in on all the ways that Sue was tying Ralph in knots, and how much he was enjoying it, while acting like he wasn’t. As usual with them, they found more and more things to talk about, until their drinks were stone-cold and they were the only people in the cafe.

She looked across the table at him as he was telling some story about his time in Gotham, and thought _I missed you._

They’d had long stretches of separation before, like after Ronnie had died the second time or after Savitar. But this was the first time it hadn’t been due to some trauma, and the first time they’d kept in touch. She’d started to live for the buzz of her phone, and more than once Barry had called her out for sneaking a look at her texts when they were trying to brainstorm about the enemy-of-the-week.

The night he’d broken up with Kamilla, she’d stared at the ceiling for close to an hour before she was able to make herself go to sleep, wondering why she had butterflies in her stomach, and why she kept thinking about him asleep in the next room, and why the door between them seemed so thin and the distance between the sofabed and her own bed seemed so short.

It would have been a bad idea, she knew that. Bad timing. But somehow she couldn’t come up with any reasons not to do it besides that.

The barista started wiping down the tables near them, and she checked her phone. “Oh, we should leave. They closed half an hour ago.”

“It’s fine!” the girl chirped in the tones of someone who’d been instructed by corporate not to ever kick someone out. “You stay as long as you like. No problem.“

"No, we should go.” Caitlin got up and tossed her cup into the trash. Cisco followed suit and hoisted his bag over his shoulder. She tried not to stare too openly at the flex of muscle in his arm as he did so.

The night was warm. He’d left in early February, hat crammed firmly on his head and mittens enveloping his hands as they said goodbye at the train station. She’d looked away from him kissing Kamilla and wrapped her arms around herself against the snowy morning, wishing as she always did that Frost could share some of her temperature imperviousness. 

Now, they strolled down the street, just the two of them, in the balmy evening. The steam-heat of summer lurked on the horizon. 

After nixing the idea of a taxi - “I’ve been traveling all day. Be good to stretch my legs. Unless you want one?” - Cisco was quiet. They’d turned down her street when he said, “So there’s something I didn’t tell you earlier about my Tinder dates.”

“They weren’t nice?”

“They were. But I made it sound like I had a bunch and actually I only had one.”

She looked at the sidewalk, pretending she had to pick her way across perfectly flat and clear concrete. “You can have as many or as few Tinder dates as you want,” she said. “It’s really none of my business.”

“They were nice,” he persisted. “And I had fun. But I also felt kind of … empty afterwards. I’d gotten used to sleeping with someone that I loved, and just sex was like whipped cream without the hot chocolate. Still a good time,” he added. “But not really satisfying, you know?”

She took that in, staring at the sidewalk. “Are - are you thinking of getting back together with Kamilla?”

He shook his head at once. “No. We were good together for awhile, but we had good reasons to break up.”

“But you thought she was the one.”

He was quiet for so long that she looked up, half-dreading his expression. But he just looked sad and pensive. 

“You know, I think I wanted her to be the one,” he said. “I wanted it so hard that I stuck with us way past our natural expiration date. And it wasn’t good for either of us.” He looked away, brushing his hair back. “But about a month into my trip, I started to realize that I missed - ” He shot her a look. “ - other people more than I missed her. And after that it was like things just started unraveling.”

She felt her face heat and her heart thump, but he was talking again. 

“So, no, I’m not getting back together with her, and I’m pretty sure she’d feel the same if I asked her.”

“So you’re going to start looking again?” she asked.

He was quiet for a moment. “Being on the road, you know, it gave me a lot of time to think. Time to look at my life from the outside. Figure out what was making me happy and what wasn’t. I worked some things out.”

“Good,” she said. “I think you needed that.” It was why she’d made the suggestion in the first place, no matter how much she’d missed him.

“And I got to see a lot of people who’d had different lives before Crisis.”

Her mouth fell open. “Did you vibe?”

He shook his head. “Mostly my powers are still gone. But every so often something did happen where I’d look at someone, and I’d see their other lives, and I’d see where the path - ” He waved his hands. “Where they sort of branched. Where one version made one choice and another version made a different one.”

"Wow,” she said, because she couldn’t think of any other response.

“Like, it was all chance which version won out, you know? When the worlds merged. Sometimes they were living their best life now, and sometimes their worst one and - god, this was a mindfuck - sometimes they were living one that was just as good. It wasn’t the same, but it was just as good.”

“That’s pretty wild.”

“And you know, a lot of times it was down to the stupidest little things like whether they braked for a yellow or not. But sometimes it was something big, like deciding to marry someone or move or take a job.”

She frowned at him. He was rambling, and she couldn’t completely follow his train of thought. “Well, yes.”

“I know, I know, life’s like that sometimes. We all know that. But seeing it like that really made me think, you know, about all the big and little choices I’ve ever made in my life and how just changing one of them could have changed everything and, you know?”

“Y … es,” she said slowly. She wasn’t sure she did, but it seemed important to him.

“And then I started thinking how I’ve still got time. We’ve all got time, right? We’ve got all the time in the world until we’re dead.”

“That’s a little morbid.”

“I know! I know. But, like, we have all this time, right? But we just spend it doing all the things we always do, in this rut, complaining about our lives and not actually doing anything that might change them. And then we keep saying, what if, what if.”

If she hadn’t been with him for the past two hours, she would have suspected him of being a little drunk. Instead, she cocked her head. “Cisco, how long have you been awake today?”

"I slept on the train,” he said. “But do you get what I’m saying?”

“I don’t think I do.” Her heart was thumping heavily in her chest, dark and slow with dread.

What if he wanted to leave Central City? Or even just Star Labs? He’d said he was home for good, but what if he’d just meant he was done with his post-Crisis tour? What if he wanted to take off all over the world? 

He rubbed his hand over his hair and muttered, “Okay, I - okay. Look. I’m saying I missed you.”

Well. That wasn’t what she’d expected.

She tucked her hands in her pockets. “I missed you, too.”

“You did?” 

“Of course I did. You’re one of my best friends.”

“Friend,” he echoed. “Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Long time now.”

“What’s it been, eight years?”

“Something like that.”

“So of course I missed you.” She unlocked the front door of her building and held it open for him. “I’m glad you’re back.”

He put his hand on her arm, stopping them in front of the mailboxes. "Do you ever think about that? About how our lives would change if something was different?”

“Who doesn’t?” She searched his face. “Cisco, what are you getting at, exactly?”

His mouth opened and closed for a moment, and then he let out a soft groan. Before Caitlin could do anything else, he’d dropped his bag with a thud, taken her face in his hands, and kissed her.

For some reason, the only thought in her head was that kissing a man with a beard was surprisingly nice. Or maybe it was kissing Cisco that was nice. More than nice.

Oh. 

_Oh._

Cisco was kissing her.

He let go before she could get her jumbled thoughts in order and retreated a step or two. “Shit,” he said. “Shit, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to just - like that - I - ”

She grabbed his jacket and hauled, and he stumbled back towards her until she could kiss him back. He was much faster on the uptake than she was, and it was only a moment before his arms wrapped around her. 

Sometime later, his forehead rested against hers. “So,” he said, eyes closed, “that’s okay then.”

“Very much okay,” she said.

His hands skimmed up her sides and then down. “Every time my phone buzzed I grabbed it. Hoping it was you.”

“So did I,” she whispered.

He opened his eyes and smiled at her. “I know the timing is weird and bad. But it’s always been weird, bad timing with us. That’s why I never did this before.”

She found herself smiling goofily. “You wanted to do this before?”

“More than once. A lot of times.”

“So we have some catching up to do.” She kissed him again. 

Someone cleared their throat, and Caitlin pulled away from Cisco to see one of her neighbors looking judgementally at her for making out with a strange man in the middle of the lobby. "I need to get my mail,” she said.

“Sorry,” she lied to Mrs. Trainor, not sorry at all, and scooted a few steps down.

“Hey Mrs. T,” Cisco said. 

She squinted at him. “Cisco? Is that you?“ She’d seen him reasonably often, and Cisco was the kind of person who could chat amiably to neighbors that Caitlin had never said two words to. 

“Yep. The beard threw you off, right? I’ve been traveling and it was easier than shaving every day.”

She looked a little mollified. “Well, welcome back.” She looked between them. “Nice to see the two of you finally got it together. Only maybe not in front of the mailboxes.”

Cisco snickered, and Caitlin elbowed him. “Sorry about that. We’ll get out of your way. Have a good night.” She grabbed Cisco’s hand and tugged him toward the elevators.

He gave her a delighted look. “I think your neighbor’s been shipping us!” he whispered. 

Caitlin hit the button. “And to think all this time I thought she just had the hots for you, asking about you so much.”

He snickered again. “No reason it can’t be both.” He turned serious. “So, I’m still staying?”

She blinked at him. “I said you could.”

“Yeah, but that was before,” he said. “I don’t want you to feel pressured or anything. I can crash at Barry and Iris’s place. Or get a hotel.”

She took that in and smiled. He knew as well as she did that inviting a man you’d just kissed into your home was a different thing than letting your friend stay for the night. “It’s fine,” she said as the elevator doors slid open. “I don’t feel pressured at all.”

He took her hand, smiling back. “Good. We can talk this out. Figure out how this is going to work. And then kiss some more.”

“That sounds like a good plan,” she said, hitting the button for her floor and sending him a coy look. “And if we both feel like it, maybe we can have some hot chocolate.”

FINIS

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [I'll Be Missing You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22792480) by [mosylu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mosylu/pseuds/mosylu)




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